The night before I went to bed thinking I was going to sleep in, and I was excited. Yes, I knew today was Sunday, but I just wasn't feeling church. Around 10:30 a.m. I rolled over in a half-asleep transe. My mind knew my body should be awake, but my body did not. Then I heard a knock at my door. I was too tired to yell come in, but I tried. It came out as a pathetic whisper. By the time I got to the door, no one was there. I thought I it was Victoria so I called her. Turned out it was Rebekah who was now with Victoria. They wanted to know if I wanted to go to church. I figured, eh I'm awake, why not? And I am glad that I did.
First, I saw this guy during worship rocking out to the music, and he reminded me of my friend Ben. He then got up on stage, and started walking around. I was excited, I thought he was going to preach, but then he walked off. At that moment I concluded he was crazy. Then a few minutes later during the offering he got back on and started singing, and he was AMAZING! If the service ended there I would have been perfectly content with going to church.
First, I saw this guy during worship rocking out to the music, and he reminded me of my friend Ben. He then got up on stage, and started walking around. I was excited, I thought he was going to preach, but then he walked off. At that moment I concluded he was crazy. Then a few minutes later during the offering he got back on and started singing, and he was AMAZING! If the service ended there I would have been perfectly content with going to church.
But then after him there were many testimonies of all generations from children to adults speaking of a conference they had just attended that was all about introducing generations to each other and showing that each generation has something to give. I don't exactly remember what they said, but it sparked up a passion within me. I have been fighting for a long time, and I still am fighting, about what I should major in. I love film. I feel called to create many films, and make a difference through them. But I also feel called to pastor the youth. During their testimonies my heart, bringing my mind along with it, began to become ripped in so many directions. I want to make movies. I want to pastor. I want to make a difference. I can't do it all. Or can I? What am I supposed to do? Crap, what did they just say? Should I pay attention to this? God, help me. I fought with my thoughts over and over, and then finally I came to a conclusion, not an answer, a conclusion because the answer has not come yet and may never come.
1. I am to spread God's word to everyone through film by using the stories I have and, without overwhelmingly doing so, placing God's presence within them
2. I am to one day preach God's word to crowds of many of the youth (whether that be right out of college, now, or days to come)
3. When I am called I am to be a personal youth pastor (and by that I mean at a church and not just preaching to many)
I determined that next semester I am going to take a class in youth ministry and two in film. I would take more in youth ministry, but you have to take one class as a prerequisite to all of the other classes. I passionately feel now that I am to follow my passion in film, and create the scripts that I have written into movies. I also believe that whether it is by power given to me through film or something totally different God is going to call me to speak out to crowds of youth. He keeps giving me visions of being on large stages talking to thousands of the youth. I also believe that one day I am supposed to be a youth pastor, but I am not sure if that is meant for me right out of college or later in life. This is the thing about having a calling, it is so confusing. You never know your next turn until God reveals it to you. It's terrifying, but it's also really exciting!
Rebekah and Victoria decided that today was the perfect day for a "High School Musical" marathon. Then when we got to the third movie they asked me over and over again to rewind a certain part (the link below is to the clip they wanted played over and over), and I had to say yes.
Clip
Sorry you had to watch that if you did. But I had to watch it at least fifteen times...
Either way today was a great day. I am glad that I went to church, and not going to lie I enjoyed the "High School Musical" marathon. Hoping for more adventures. Talk to you soon!
1. I am to spread God's word to everyone through film by using the stories I have and, without overwhelmingly doing so, placing God's presence within them
2. I am to one day preach God's word to crowds of many of the youth (whether that be right out of college, now, or days to come)
3. When I am called I am to be a personal youth pastor (and by that I mean at a church and not just preaching to many)
I determined that next semester I am going to take a class in youth ministry and two in film. I would take more in youth ministry, but you have to take one class as a prerequisite to all of the other classes. I passionately feel now that I am to follow my passion in film, and create the scripts that I have written into movies. I also believe that whether it is by power given to me through film or something totally different God is going to call me to speak out to crowds of youth. He keeps giving me visions of being on large stages talking to thousands of the youth. I also believe that one day I am supposed to be a youth pastor, but I am not sure if that is meant for me right out of college or later in life. This is the thing about having a calling, it is so confusing. You never know your next turn until God reveals it to you. It's terrifying, but it's also really exciting!
Rebekah and Victoria decided that today was the perfect day for a "High School Musical" marathon. Then when we got to the third movie they asked me over and over again to rewind a certain part (the link below is to the clip they wanted played over and over), and I had to say yes.
Clip
Sorry you had to watch that if you did. But I had to watch it at least fifteen times...
Either way today was a great day. I am glad that I went to church, and not going to lie I enjoyed the "High School Musical" marathon. Hoping for more adventures. Talk to you soon!
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